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YOU CUPCAKE

all bodies of earth fill up with high-pressure lava, then split simultaneously. most of planet earth's surface is covered with a thin of lava. then the process repeats itself. humanity is ruined, but not as dramatically as you'd like. all objects you own now talk to you. constantly. in welsh...

titanic nooo you know like at the end of starwars -1... and is there a significant nooo in the actual titanic movie?

titanic off like when you try to beat another person at doing impossible things. and i think it was deliberate, this satisfies both.

began wearing sunglasses and a medical mask while bicycling again. four girls screamed and an elementary school boy looked freaked out.

the upper half is rhino. it can't walk. i wish for the ability to change the color of sunlight

sun downer

ninja ghosts can't possess you if your soul is on fire

pondering hat

gun that shoots shurikens and lightning

hat salesman

you grow to 144 times your mass and will fart continuously for the rest of your life. the rest is up to you. wearing black leather pants, with boots too tall to see me, i wish to rock out in my dreams

death from trying to snort gunpowder without being the right kind of magic

death (of a) salesman

a powder-mage

anything that comes out of your body is now glow in the dark. i wish for the ability make any vehicle i use or ride as resilient as a very resilient tank and as agile as a very agile parkour-master without needing more power.

you gain the power to possess anyone who has ever had a trademark hairstyle, for a month at a time; with a cool-down of one month. while possessing, you are in a coma and your body ages at twelve times its normal speed. you do the tractor thing before you realize the cost. i wish organizing...

concrete-breathing dragon